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a new thai film with a strong chinese flavor, which uses delicate film language to tell the typical dilemma of east asian families and depicts the living conditions of women under traditional concepts, has become a recent hot topic.

author | zhao wanxi

editor | zhan tengyu

title image | "grandma's grandson"

this summer, surrounded by a number of international blockbusters and domestic realistic films, the thai film "grandma's grandson" unexpectedly stood out.

this new film, which tells the story of a chinese family in thailand, not only moved countless fans who walked into the theaters, earning 50 million yuan in box office revenue in just five days, but also had more than 60,000 ratings on douban, with a stable score of 9.0.

many people's impression of thai movies may still remain on campus youth films and horror thrillers. we have rarely seen a movie like "grandma's grandson" that completely focuses on the family affection of thai chinese families.

the structure, conflicts and emotions of a chinese family shown in the film are infinitely close to us, without any barriers. chinese audiences will not be affected by regional and language differences and can easily see their own situations from the plot and characters.

the plot of the movie is very simple: an (ma qunyao), an unemployed young man from a chinese family in thailand, saw his cousin inherit the property for taking care of his seriously ill grandfather, and he also became interested in his terminally ill grandmother (usa samekham), planning to replicate his cousin's "road to wealth" to obtain a million-baht inheritance. however, his successful uncle and uneducated younger uncle are obstacles to an's journey to become a "full-time filial grandson", so he can only work hard to improve his weight in his grandmother's heart.

grandma and her family. (photo: "grandma's grandson")

just by looking at the movie introduction, you would think that this is another movie that simply tells the story of filial piety and family affection, and mercilessly hits the audience's tear glands through long music and a large number of dramatic lines. but after entering the theater, you will find that the topics covered in "grandma's grandson" are much broader than this: inheritance, empty-nest elderly, hospice care, the dedication and sacrifice of east asian women in the family... through the simple and unpretentious narrative, the director pours the love and pain of chinese families into our hearts like a stream of water.

money calculation and grandma's life

the main plot of "grandma's grandson", and also its biggest dramatic conflict, comes from the money schemes between relatives, which can also be seen from its english name how to make millions before grandma dies.

almost all the men in the film have their eyes on this elderly woman suffering from cancer.

after learning that his cousin inherited the property because she took care of her seriously ill grandfather, the idle ah an moved to his grandmother's house to take care of her daily life; his eldest uncle ah qiang wanted to take his mother to his own home, under the pretext of wanting to be his mother's "full-time son."

their goal is the same, to get the inheritance from their grandmother/mother. this is an unspoken "conspiracy" between the two parties.

"full-time weird grandson" ah an and his grandmother. (photo/"grandma's grandson")

in contrast, my uncle soi has no proper job and owes a million baht in foreign debt. whenever he can't make ends meet, he goes back to my grandmother's house to ask for money. although my grandmother says she doesn't want him to visit her often, every time he gets into trouble, she still helps him fill the debt gap. my uncle doesn't need to worry about the inheritance. his natural advantages in gender and blood relationship are his confidence among his brothers and sisters.

in contrast, an's mother, grandmother's second daughter, xiu, is the only one who does not seek anything from her mother. she lost her husband in middle age, her son dropped out of school and worked in a supermarket. she did not shirk her obligation to support her mother, nor did she deliberately try to please her mother for the inheritance.

ah xiu and ah an. (photo: "grandma's grandson")

but if the story only shows the calculations of the younger generations for the grandmother's inheritance, the whole story will become clichéd. what is even more rare in "grandma's grandson" is that it uses this family's internal money calculations to show the life of the real protagonist in the play - grandma.

when she was young, my grandmother was also someone’s daughter. she was arranged to marry a “bad man” by her parents and spent her youth in a difficult situation. before her parents died, she took care of them the most, but in the end, the inheritance of several million thai baht was inherited by her brother and she got nothing.

later, the grandma became someone's mother, grandmother, and grandmother. when her eldest son was in poor health when he was young, she, who loved eating beef, began to give up beef and pray for her son; when her youngest son was a failure, she would always be soft-hearted and help him fill the deficit and send away the debt collectors; when she realized that her suddenly considerate grandson was actually eyeing her inheritance, she remained calm and just put on the white shirt she had bought for him, hoping that he could find a good job.

grandma and her grandson. (photo: "grandma's grandson")

faced with the torture of illness and the fear of death, grandma would break down in the middle of the night, crying to her parents, begging them to take her away. her parents' indifference became a lifelong wound for grandma. when she becomes a mother and a grandmother herself, what will she do when she faces the financial and emotional demands of her children and grandchildren?

this kind of demand, wrapped in a heavy layer of family affection and filial piety, is the most familiar to all east asians and the most difficult to escape. in the face of demands, how to allocate money and emotions within the family is also the most difficult proposition to solve for every family with more than one child.

"sons inherit estates, daughters inherit cancer"

although the film delves into the interior of this chinese family from the perspective of the grandson ah-an, the dedication and sacrifice of women in the family is a moving undercurrent in the film.

if we simply compare the support responsibilities undertaken by the children, there is no doubt that a xiu is the one who should have priority in inheritance among the brothers and sisters.

when she was in school, she felt sorry for her mother's hard work to earn money for the family, so she dropped out of school and helped her mother sell porridge. after getting married, she was the most frequent attendee at family day every weekend. when she learned that her mother had cancer, she changed her morning shift at the supermarket to the evening shift, gave up her daytime sleep, and took her mother to chemotherapy and exercise. she would kindly remind her mother to throw away the leftovers in the refrigerator and replace them with fresh food. it was also she who helped her younger brother to block his older brother's obstruction and finally get her mother's property.

but as a married daughter, her mother never seemed to include her in the list of heirs. this point does not even need to be explained in detail, as it is the consensus of every member of this type of family, a consensus that is hidden deep but enough to drag people into the abyss.

ah xiu and her grandmother. (photo: "grandma's grandson")

after she was diagnosed with cancer, her grandson kept asking her who was the first in her heart. she thought for a long time and said to her daughter, "i don't know who is the first in my heart, but i want you to be with me the most." although her daughter did not have a share of the inheritance, she still hoped that her daughter would be by her side when she died.

this is a speechless and irrefutable inertia: hoping that the daughter - or only relying on the daughter to support oneself, but the daughter has no share in the inheritance.

ah xiu also tolerated this and accepted the suppression of this concept. she knew that she had no right to fight for the inheritance and could only comfort herself that "giving is always more reassuring than receiving". when her mother cared about her and asked her not to eat leftovers because cancer can also be inherited, she replied casually: "yes, sons inherit the inheritance and daughters inherit cancer".

this was the greatest resentment she could express towards her mother.

“giving is always more reassuring than receiving.” (photo/grandma’s grandson)

women are tightly bound to their families, and the responsibilities they bear, the status they enjoy, and the final distribution of inheritance are often not equal. this kind of exclusion of female members in east asian families not only happens to ah xiu, but also pervades the lives of every female character in the film.

my aunt ping was disliked by every family member. no one considered her a family member from the bottom of their hearts, even though she fulfilled her obligation to support her as a daughter-in-law.

my grandmother was also a victim of the idea of ​​favoring boys over girls. after she became seriously ill, she went to her brother, who lived in a luxurious house with many children and grandchildren, and hoped that he would give her some money to buy a cemetery for her. after her parents passed away, her brother inherited several million thai baht, but she had nothing. she hoped that her brother would pity her for this.

unexpectedly, the brother who was reminiscing with his sister affectionately and singing together in the previous second, became cold and indifferent the next second, telling her not to come again in the future, and said that they were not a family if they had different surnames, and he would never give her a penny.

the brief warmth between the brother and sister. (photo/grandma's grandson)

as woolf said, "as a woman, i have no country." as a woman, it is also difficult to have a home of her own. in "grandma's grandson", whether in her mother's family, her husband's family or her husband's family, women are always excluded.

east asian love mixed with love and pain

my grandmother's family immigrated from chaozhou, and chinese elements can be seen everywhere in the movie: chinese new year, tomb sweeping on qingming festival, chinese opera playing on tv, my grandmother occasionally speaking chaozhou dialect, chaozhou nursery rhymes that appear several times... the director uses scattered plots and fine stitches to string together the entire movie, and occasionally embellishes it with a little humor.

through this thai film with a strong chinese flavor, we can watch the fire from afar and yet deeply feel the tension of family and human emotions, and the love and pain under family affection in the specific context of east asia.

grandma, who lives alone, is lonely. she would wear her most beautiful clothes on family day every weekend, sit on a bench at the door, lean on a cane, and wait for her children and grandchildren to arrive one by one. she would also tell her grandchildren that she disliked the first day of the first lunar month the most, because there was a lot of new year's eve dinner left in the refrigerator, and she didn't know when she would finish it.

grandma is waiting for her grandchildren at the door. (photo: "grandma's grandson")

in the grandmother's heart, her children and grandchildren are always the most important. even if the shoes given by her eldest son hurt her feet, she would always wear them. when she went to the temple with her eldest son's family to pray for blessings, her prayer note was filled with blessings for each child, hoping that her children would have a happy family and that her grandson would find a good job. however, the wishes of her eldest son's family of three did not mention the grandmother who was suffering from cancer.

when teased by her grandson a'an, grandma defended herself by saying that they had their own family and they should think about their own family first, but on the way back, grandma finally chose to change the pair of shoes that didn't fit.

the relationship between grandma and an is a clue that is gradually laid out in the movie and is worth pondering and digging into. at the beginning, an bought fried fish and installed surveillance for grandma, perhaps more out of the desire for inheritance, but unknowingly, the relationship between the grandparents and grandchildren, which had been neglected, was slowly picked up and warmed each other's hearts.

love is flowing. (photo/grandma's grandson)

the wish that ah an wrote on the prayer note was that he hoped his grandma would win the lottery - his grandma had mentioned it casually before, so he kept it in mind. his grandma didn't like to button the bottom button of her floral shirt, joking that she wanted to show off her sexiness; at the end of the movie, she was sent to a nursing home by her youngest son, with her clothes buttoned up neatly. she was ready to leave this world, but fortunately, ah an appeared at this time and took her home.

the two were walking on their way home. (photo/grandma's grandson)

after learning that his grandmother did not give him the property, ah an angrily questioned his grandmother, asking her what position he held in her heart. the dying old lady could only shed tears and said to him, "i have nothing to leave you, and you don't have to take care of me anymore."

after his grandmother passed away, ah an found out that she had been saving an education fund for him since he was a child. when she wanted to buy a cemetery, she would rather ask her brother, whom she had not contacted for several years, than use the money. in the end, ah an used the money to buy a cemetery for his grandmother. on the funeral car, he knocked on his grandmother's coffin and said to her, "i put you first."

love is confirmed and strengthened in the flow. passing through the cracks of time, through the separation of life and death, all the inequalities and grievances such as money distribution and family responsibilities are temporarily put aside, leaving only the endless and reciprocating love between relatives.