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The second season of "Childhood in a Foreign Land" has finally come to the last episode.Zhou YijunTake us to have an in-depth visit to the Thai families whose children accompany their children to study.

In recent years, Thailand has gradually become a popular choice for young students to study abroad.Not only is the cost of living here low, but the rich and diverse international education environment has also attracted many Chinese families to come and accompany their children in their studies.

For these accompanying families, education is not just about the children, it also deeply affects their family relationships, personal growth and the reshaping of their social roles.

Studying in Thailand: Ideal and Reality

Studying in Thailand seems bright, but behind the halo there are unavoidable problems.

Children need to face cultural shock and identity challenges, while parents need to adapt to a new pace of life, learn to let go of their past sense of accomplishment, and find their own position again.

Before this, many problems were difficult to foresee.

1. Parents who give up their careers to accompany their children to study

Kang Zheyu's father, Kang Liwei, originally ran a real estate business in China, but for the sake of their children's education, he and his wife decided to give up everything and come to Thailand to become full-time accompanying parents.

Now he has opened a Muay Thai gym in Chiang Mai, which is a brand new attempt.But Thailand's legal and cultural differences made him face many challenges in the course of his business.

Because to do business in Thailand, Thais must hold more than 51% of the shares and must hire Thais, so it is difficult to fully control the business.

Through this experience of accompanying his children to study, he gradually realized thatEducation is not just about choosing a school, real education should be at home.

He said: "I should become that kind of person myself, so that my children can become what I want them to be."

2. The mom stuck in identity

Parents who accompany their children to study abroad hope that their children can grow up in a better educational environment, but this choice often requires them to give up their own careers and social lives.

Wu Yun's family is from Guiyang. She used to be a bank president, and now she is a full-time mother of three children.

She admitted that although she had prepared herself mentally for the challenges she might face, the change in identity still brought a huge psychological gap.

"In the past, I could proudly say that I was a bank president, but now when filling out my occupation at the airport, I can only write 'housewife'. Although this is the choice I made for my children, the gap still makes me confused."

Wu Yun believes that Thailand has abundant educational resources. She arranged German classes for her children, not because the children like it, but as an educational strategy.

She explained,German education is almost a one-stop shop, and many German universities are free, which is very cost-effective.

After arriving in Chiang Mai, she realized that life is not a wilderness, but just a different track, and she needs to change the track and continue moving forward.

3. She once refused to become a “stay-at-home mom”

In Chiang Mai, parents not only have to deal with cultural and legal differences, but also changes in family relationships. 17-year-old Wang Zhe and his mother have been in Chiang Mai for less than a year, but have already experienced many arguments and frictions.

Wang Zhe's mother once firmly said that she would never be a housewife.But for the sake of her child's future, she gave up her career, separated from her husband, and took on the responsibility of taking care of the child in a foreign country.

This choice brought about huge life changes and forced the child to grow up overnight.

His son Wang Zhe said: "Now that you are out, you must be going to college."He knew that it was impossible for him to pass the exam and return to China. He had no way out and could only move forward courageously.

My mother thought that at the very least I should be admitted to Chiang Mai University, because its international ranking is on par with China Agricultural University, and this is a backup dream.

4. A family's journey

Accompanying children to study abroad is not only a personal choice for mothers, but also a readjustment of the entire family relationship.

Bai Bo and his two daughters can only see each other once every six months. His mobile phone has been recording the height and weight changes of his daughters and wife.For him, the deepest feeling during this period was not loneliness, but worry.

His wife Wang Jun has to face a series of practical problems in Chiang Mai, such as renting a house, education, and insurance.

She said,It is difficult to get the deposit back when renting a house, and the medical resources of public hospitals are limited to Thais, which increases the complexity of life.This is also a blind spot in the knowledge of many families who accompany their children to study.

Many people think that education in Thailand is a stepping stone to British and American universities. However, after experiencing it, Bai Bo believes that these are two completely different things.

Multicultural backgrounds: challenges and opportunities

Niu Yafan, who has lived in Chiang Mai for five years, is not only a parent who accompanies her child to study, she is also a PhD student at the Faculty of Social Sciences at Chiang Mai University.

She studied 38 Chinese families studying in Chiang Mai, and explored issues such as children's travel, study abroad, and mobility from the perspectives of sociology, anthropology, and education.

She believes that"The disconnect between family education and social culture is an unavoidable problem in transnational education. Parents must find a balance between maintaining traditions and integrating into new cultures."

Among the many transnational accompanying families, some families become closer during this period, while others face the breakdown and readjustment of relationships.

Even so, the parents still firmly believe that it is all worth it for their children's future.

They constantly adjust their roles, replan the future of their family, and strive to create a stable growth environment for their children in a foreign country.

Most families who send their children to study abroad seek an experiential travel lifestyle, so the children’s identity becomes a big issue.

Dr. Niu Yafan gave an example: She once took her daughter to a restaurant for dinner, and a Chinese mother asked her daughter where she was from. The daughter's answer surprised her, and after thinking for a while, she replied, "I am from Chiang Mai."

This is also what makes Chiang Mai interesting. Chiang Mai is a multicultural place, which is what we call cosmopolitanism.

The most Buddhist place also has chicken babies

Mr. Ren Guohua has taught in a public school in Thailand for many years. He believes that Thailand’s standards for success are unique.

In the minds of Thai people, even if they cannot find a job after graduation, they will not be completely without a way out. Therefore, in the Thai education system, students can not do homework, but they cannot not participate in activities.

Because students' participation in activities will be quantified and scored,These activities have greatly improved their hands-on ability and social adaptability. When they graduate, students become "finished products" and can immediately integrate into the work team.

In Thailand, when there is too much homework, students will choose not to complete it. In order to ensure that all students pass the exam, teachers have to lower the standards.

But this is not actually a lowering of standards, but a difference in educational philosophy.The so-called "lowering of standards" may just be the relaxation of homework requirements, but in other aspects, students still have a lot to explore and learn.

The unique education model gives Thai students unique competitiveness in creative work. Thailand's developed advertising industry is a typical example.

Dr. Niu Yafan believes that although Thailand’s overall educational philosophy may seem Buddhist, in fact, the local middle class has high educational requirements for their children.

These Thai middle-class families attach great importance to their children's education and enroll them in various academic tutoring classes and interest classes, such as piano, ballet, golf, etc.

Chinese families in Thailand have quickly found a similar path, because for most families accompanying their children, Thailand is just a stepping stone to English-speaking countries.

In addition to academic performance, developing children's sports expertise may also be an effective way to achieve this goal.

Generally speaking,In Thailand, basically as long as you have a middle-income, that is,Households with a monthly income of around 20,000 Thai baht (about 4,000 RMB)Everyone can afford golf.

The "daddy" and his family are from Beijing. While accompanying his daughter to study in Thailand, the "daddy" was fully responsible for his daughter's golf training, including choosing clubs, dealing with weather changes, and even how to dress and what to eat before the game.

But his goal is not to train his daughter to be a professional player, but to follow the path that has been taken by predecessors.

Because one of them is a mother from Shanghai, her daughter was admitted to a university in the Midwest of the United States through playing golf and also received a scholarship.

What is the real problem in education?

When you first come to Thailand, many people may think that as long as you solve the problem of your children's education, other problems will be solved. However, this is not the case.

Under the impact of transnational culture,Children need to deal with many things independently, and parents cannot fully understand their feelings or provide them with guidance based on their own experience.

These children have different life experiences. They have accumulated many unique experiences since childhood.This independence may, to some extent, translate into loneliness and even psychological trauma.

Xiaoxiao, a Thai mother who accompanies her child to study abroad, was once a young overseas student.

When she was 12 years old, her parents sent her to study in Singapore. The long-term life in a foreign land made her living habits completely different from her parents, and even caused huge differences in the way of educating the next generation.

Parents advocate a gentle way of education and think that children should be more tolerant, butXiaoxiao had an impatient personality and even used a cane to discipline her father out of anxiety, accidentally hitting him.

When talking about her experience of going abroad alone at the age of 12, she admitted that she was very sad at first and felt helpless and lost in the unfamiliar environment. Although there was a lot of well-intentioned help around her, nothing could fill the void in her heart.

Therefore, she was determined not to let her child go abroad at the age of 12, and she must stay with her child.

Among the parents who accompanied the children to study, there was a special father, Master Yuanman, who used to work in an institution but has now become a monk, and his wife is taking care of the children.

Master Yuanman believes that when educating children, always thinking about shaping and intervening in their growth is not an ideal way.

He firmly believed that a different group of people, society or country could not be expected to become what one desired.

He once told a teacher friend that you can't assume that all children are good, because once you find out that your child has done something bad, this assumption will cause your worldview to collapse.

This actually has nothing to do with the children. Assuming that all children are good is actually just one's own expectation.

Master Yuanman believes thatIf you truly love children and love education, then you should love and educate them no matter how they behave.

He also said that when you face yourself bravely and choose to continue after seeing the truth, you will have great power.

On the road to studying in Thailand, parents and children have gone through a difficult journey.

For the sake of their children's future, they chose to leave their familiar environment and step into a strange country.While accompanying children to study abroad brings them opportunities and growth in a multicultural environment, it also makes them bear the pressure of loneliness and uncertainty.

Although Thailand is just a transit point on the way to higher educational goals, this experience has a profound impact on every family.

Regardless of the future, many parents and children are still exploring the possibilities of their own education in a foreign country.