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"only fathers are allowed to attend, and no leave is allowed." before the start of the new semester, hangzhou caihe middle school held a "good fathers' parents' meeting" and invited fathers of first-year junior high school students to attend. nowadays, more and more schools are using activities such as fathers' parent meetings, open days, and sports meets to guide fathers to better "perform their duties" during their children's growth.

only fathers are allowed to attend parent-teacher conferences

i hope they will clarify their parenting responsibilities.

hangzhou caihe middle school held a "good dad parents' meeting". image source: hangzhou caihe middle school

in many schools, the parents' meetings are almost exclusively attended by mothers, while fathers are rarely seen. for this reason, some meetings have become "mothers' meetings". this time, the hangzhou caihe middle school parent meeting "only allows fathers to attend", which is a correction to the fact that fathers are often absent from parent meetings.

"in the education of children, fathers' involvement is generally lower than that of mothers. the 'pillars' should clearly understand the role and responsibilities of the father in parenting." hu hengheng, vice principal of caihe middle school, said that she hopes that through the "dads' parent-teacher meeting", they will know how to understand the physical and psychological changes of their children in junior high school.

the fathers also attached great importance to this parent-teacher conference. a freshman in the first grade of junior high school, along with his mother and younger brother, sent his father to attend the parent-teacher conference. several fathers of students specially came back from other places. one of them was on a business trip in fujian and took a high-speed train back to hangzhou. after the conference, he bought a ticket to return to complete his work.

many schools have launched special programs for fathers.

parents' meetings, open days and other activities

nowadays, more and more schools choose fathers as the protagonists of parent-teacher conferences.

in november 2020, a parent meeting was held for fourth graders at weidou primary school in beilun district, ningbo, and fathers were required to attend.

last year, hangzhou pengbo primary school invited fathers of first and second grade students to attend a parent-teacher meeting. among the 240 second grade students, 191 fathers were present. the school asked them to complete a "knowing your children questionnaire", which consisted of ten questions, each worth 10 points. 80 people scored less than 60 points, and the lowest score was 10 points.

in addition, "dad open day" and "dad teaching assistant" are also options for many schools.

last november, the second experimental primary school in yanliang district, xi'an, launched the "smart dads in the classroom", and 14 fathers from various industries took the stage.

last december, the parent open day at binhe primary school in laixi city, qingdao stated that "only fathers are allowed to attend and no leave is allowed." fathers made noodles and played games with their children.

hangzhou shentangqiao kindergarten is recruiting a "dad sports team" where dads take turns to lead morning exercises in each class.

in april this year, during the "dads entering campus" activity at the wangjiafan town central kindergarten in yidu city, hubei province, fathers told the middle-grade children how seeds germinate and provided safety education.

survey shows

only 7.5% of parents take care of their children together

"dad takes care of the baby and the main thing is to let him do whatever he wants." on social platforms, you can often see women complaining about their husbands taking care of the baby.

the results of the "fourth survey on the social status of chinese women" organized and implemented by the all-china women's federation and the national bureau of statistics in 2020 show:

in my country, only 7.5% of families have both parents taking care of their children together, and only 11.7% have both parents jointly undertaking educational activities.

homework tutoring for children aged 0 to 17 is mainly undertaken by mothers, accounting for 67.5%. they not only have to take care of their children's food, clothing, shelter and daily life, but also bear most of the responsibilities of family education: choosing schools, interest classes, and habit formation...

a report in china women magazine last year analyzed the reasons for the lack of fatherhood:

on the one hand, fathers are influenced by traditional ideas and believe that educating children is a woman's and school's business. they lack the awareness of active participation or do not know how to interact with their children.

on the other hand, in the traditional family model, the father mainly appears as the "economic pillar", which is more obvious in low-income families, while the working pace in cities often forces fathers to devote more energy to work.

some fathers lack reasonable parenting knowledge and methods and simply shift the burden to the mothers.

father's company

it can help children have stronger abilities

the above report pointed out that the sequelae of the absence of fatherhood have already appeared in the growth of children: cautiousness, timidity, lack of self-confidence, weak motor skills, etc. in early childhood, the care of the mother can give the child a sense of security, while the role of the father as a role model in adolescence is even more important. the company of the father can enable the child to have stronger hands-on ability, rational analysis ability of things, creativity, and sense of responsibility.

mothers may wish to think more about the benefits of having fathers take care of their children, make more use of their advantages in sports, hands-on ability, interpersonal communication, etc., give them trust and praise, cooperate with each other, and learn from each other's strengths and weaknesses.

in the opinion of chen qi, a psychological teaching and research fellow in hangzhou's xihu district, when it comes to academics, children most need to be determined and understand why they are studying, and fathers can play a key role in this regard. mothers are sometimes more emotional in their children's education, and fathers also need to act as "emotion stabilizers."

what do you think about the "dads' parents' meeting"? how should parents raise their children in real life? are you a little nervous about the school starting soon?

traditional chinese medicine teaches you a few tricks to help your child quickly "refocus"

recently, the summer vacation is coming to an end and the school start date for primary and secondary school students is approaching. however, many parents have found that their children are showing bad conditions such as tension, anxiety, laziness, evasion, inattention, and procrastination in completing homework.

cai yahong, director of the chronic disease management department of the first affiliated hospital of hunan university of chinese medicine, introduced that at the beginning of the school season, children go from the relaxation of the holidays to the tension of school. especially for some children who are about to enter junior high school or high school, facing the unknown new environment and academic pressure, they may experience many psychological changes, leading to a series of physical and mental maladjustments.

the doctor gave a detailed introduction on how to help children quickly "focus", adjust their mental state, and actively adapt to the new semester's study and life.

1. adjust your work and rest schedule

the first step to return to the state of learning is to adjust the biological clock and synchronize the school's schedule. you can gradually adjust your child's schedule before school starts, such as going to bed 10 minutes earlier and getting up earlier every day than the previous day. you should also ensure adequate sleep and regular diet, exercise appropriately, and strengthen your physical fitness to better help your child adapt to the pace of study and life in the new semester.

2. reduce the time you spend using electronic products

1. positive suggestion method: recall your campus life when you did not use electronic products. similar memories will bring positive psychological experiences.

2. small step improvement method: gradually reduce the time of using electronic products and let family members supervise. for example, playing for 20 minutes less a day can greatly reduce children's dependence on electronic products.

3. active substitution method: do more things that make you happy to replace the use of electronic products, such as playing ball, swimming, painting, etc.

3. set learning goals with your child

parents can discuss with their children to set learning goals for the new semester, clarify learning tasks and plans, and encourage children to plan their study time independently. this can stimulate children's learning motivation, enhance their self-confidence, and cultivate a sense of responsibility and self-discipline.

4. encourage your child to participate in extracurricular activities

participating in extracurricular activities helps to cultivate children's interests and hobbies and broaden their horizons. parents can encourage their children to participate in various activities organized by the school, such as clubs, sports games, etc., so that children can make new friends in the new semester and cultivate their teamwork and leadership skills.

according to tcm, emotional problems are often related to the balance of yin and yang in the body, and the circulation of qi and blood. when children are nervous and anxious about the start of school, their yang energy is easily damaged and the circulation of qi and blood is blocked. therefore, tcm advocates helping children relieve emotional problems from the perspective of regulating the body.

1. chinese medicine conditioning

in response to children’s nervousness and anxiety, chinese medicine recommends the use of some herbal remedies that have the ability to calm the nerves and harmonize qi and blood, such as chinese jujube seeds, polygala tenuifolia, and poria cocos, to help children better adapt to life in the new semester.

2. essential oil aromatherapy

essential oil aromatherapy uses essential oils extracted from aromatic drugs or aromatic drugs as a medium to make appropriate dosage forms and apply aromatherapy according to syndrome differentiation. it acts on the human body through acupoint massage, breathing, application, indoor fragrance, smelling and other methods, which can regulate the qi of internal organs and yin and yang, promote physical and mental balance, and relieve tension, anxiety and other negative emotions.

3. medicinal diet

diet is also an important part of emotional regulation. parents can prepare some foods that have the effects of calming the mind, replenishing qi, and nourishing blood for their children, such as red dates, longans, lotus seeds, etc., to help their children adjust their physical and mental state.

doctors remind that it is a gradual process for children to adapt to the new semester. parents do not need to worry too much. they should maintain a calm mindset, increase their children's sense of security, establish good communication channels with their children, provide positive guidance to their children, and help them adapt to their new study life smoothly.

(source: xiaoxiang morning news)

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