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recently, i saw a short video of cctv's mid-autumn festival gala, which was a chorus of "new boy" by four male hosts.

anthony galluzzo said it well:

a big part of the reason why consumerism becomes consumerism is because demand is created, and consumers always use the judgment of others as a criterion for their self-worth.as anthony said, with this mindset, the most important thing is not your own success, but how you appear successful in the eyes of others.

it is better to solve the problem than to block it, the same is true for resisting consumerism.

after news reports of children stealing huge sums of money from their parents to buy cards, many schools in beijing have banned children from bringing cards into school. some parents cut their children's cards into pieces in anger, but children who want to buy cards still find ways to do so. some parents said helplessly that this has only happened 0 or countless times.

in the process of studying children's consumption, psychologist susan also found out why children fall into the cycle of "buy ➡ dissatisfaction ➡ buy again"? because children place their hopes of gaining happiness, integrating into the group, and maintaining friendships on spending money.thinking that “spending money will make me happy” and “spending money will make me popular” actually makes it more difficult to have fun and maintain relationships in the long run.

psychology shows that the more materialistic people are, the more likely they are to feel lack and disappointment.

deliberately not consuming will not solve the root cause; satisfying spiritual needs is the correct solution.

an artist once said on weibo that he believed the best way to resist consumerism was to create.

it may sound a bit abrupt at first, but it is easy to understand if we give an example: when we need to buy something to prove our own value, it actually proves that we ourselves do not have the ability to create value, so we need to buy a ready-made product.

but what if children have the ability to create themselves? when a picture falls on a piece of white paper, a melody flows out of the piano, and a code realizes a function, this is actually "turning stone into gold" and creating meaning.

it is said that children today live in a good era where they do not need to worry about material life, but from another perspective,the spiritual needs of this generation of children are precisely what need more attention.。

when they stare at the glamorous and exquisite posts on social media, while they still have to go through troubles every day, anxiety and tension are inevitable. but if they can focus on those who need help and things that need to be changed, their thoughts and perspectives will be opened up immediately.

the bund once published an article, the protagonist isabella has a very impressive statement:in life, don’t always expect others to change for you, or think that they must respond to your efforts. learn to find value in yourself.

with the help of her mother, isabella has been doing charity work since elementary school, supporting several younger brothers and sisters from poor families, from mailing clothes to field visits and exchanges, to encouraging younger brothers and sisters to go to college...

everyone says she has a stable core. she told the bund that it is her persistence in charity and doing a little bit every day to change the world that allows her to draw strength from it. this is also why she insisted on doing charity even when studying in the united states.

therefore, if children’s needs are not met, they will still want to consume.but if children have the ability to create their own value, rather than relying on the evaluation of others for the standard of value judgment, they can truly break the circle of consumerism.

lifelong learning, only by being strong can you go further

in this era when short videos can easily fuel consumerism, there is one point that cannot be ignored, that is, how to help children stay awake in the short, flat and fast pace, which is also the basis of value creation ability.

one after another, the short videos are like small candies, which make the brain start to release dopamine. in addition to bringing pleasure, dopamine also increases the "sense of desire", so we can't help but keep scrolling because the next one is better.

screenshot from the documentary "surveillance capitalism: the smart trap"

but at what cost?

the american science account better labs calls this state“the lost zone of social media”(social media limbo). it means that once people develop the habit of watching short videos,it is difficult to concentrate on complex and in-depth events, and they are always waiting to be pleased by external stimuli.。

many studies have also found thatrepeatedly watching short videos will make the brain lose self-control and even make the cerebral cortex thinner. it is not an exaggeration to say that "short videos have eaten up the brain."

to escape this "social media lost zone",helping the brain take back control。

one way is to read deeply and think critically.because it means looking beyond the literal meaning, not believing everything you see, not being superficial, not following the crowd.

knowledge-based internet celebrity he senbao was also troubled by short videos for a time. in a report by phoenix.com, he said that his solution was in-depth reading. he believed thatthe brain is hungry for meaning"when you read books, which are high-information carriers, your brain will quickly feel 'full.' when your hunger for meaning is satisfied, you will no longer rely on short videos."

what i believe is more long-term than in-depth reading and thinking is lifelong learning.

whether it is consumerism or short videos, the most fundamental method is not to seek strength from the outside, but to cultivate oneself.learning is also a means. letting children find their own value and grow their own roots is the ultimate goal and the meaning of growth.

kate flanders, a wall street journal bestseller, has published a book called the year of less, which is about a year in which she restricted her mindless consumption. in addition to her firm determination to let go of things, what inspired me even more was her constant examination of the meaning of her life:

in the infinite game of education, the growth of children cannot be summarized by external evaluations such as grades, awards, certificates, and praise, not to mention the various pacifiers that quickly satisfy the material desires of the moment under consumerism.it comes from using it as a standard for self-definition to prove one's own value and being willing to pursue and work hard for it.。

consumerism is a big topic, and sometimes it is hard for parents to resist it. however, the problem is not solved overnight. some parents even buy a whole box of cards for their children to draw cards, and draw all rare cards (this is just my personal opinion, i don’t recommend blindly imitating them), so that their children can draw cards they don’t want to see to solve the problem.

but what we are more happy to see is that children can find what their hearts desire and establish firm values ​​through constant exploration and experimentation.