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on september 22, xiaoyu, her mother lu mei, and two younger sisters were taken to beijing by the beijing new sunshine charity foundation. the mother and daughter finally moved into a normal room, took a good bath, and slept on a normal bed.

the previous month, including the mid-autumn festival, three sick girls were taken alone by their mother lu mei, who broke her leg and was limping, in the outpatient hall of a hospital in shanghai.

xiaoyu is 10 years old and was born in a small western town. he was originally smart, lively and had excellent academic performance, but he has suffered from multiple illnesses such as kidney disease and appendicitis all year round. what is even more unfortunate is that when she was seeking medical treatment in shanghai in 2023, she was molested in the ward and suffered from severe post-traumatic stress disorder (ptsd).

according to the shanghai pudong new area people's procuratorate, at about 19:00 on october 24, 2023, in the neurology ward of a children's hospital in shanghai, while 9-year-old xiaoyu was alone in the ward, yang moumou, the grandfather of the child in the next bed, used xiao yu was molested by touching her face, feet and inner thighs with her hands.

this nightmare pushed xiaoyu and her family deeper into the quagmire. one year later, xiaoyu is still unable to communicate with others normally. she needs to cover her face with a hat, mask and scarf most of the time, and her mood is extremely unstable. she resists all strangers, especially strange men.

on september 22, on the high-speed train from shanghai to beijing, xiaoyu started to have a fever again. on the night of arriving in beijing, her fever reached 39.9°c. she refused to take the medicine at first, but her mother coaxed her for a while before xiaoyu reluctantly took the medicine.

one layer after another of nearly desperate difficulties piled on the mother and son. when they were pressed to the point where they could hardly breathe, a group of charity workers stepped forward and worked together to create a "social service icu" for xiaoyu's family. help the mother and daughter get through difficult times and rebuild their lives.

nightmare

time goes back to 2023. at that time, xiaoyu and her sister xiaokui suffered from kidney disease, long-term hematuria, abdominal pain and repeated high fever, and treatment in their hometown was ineffective. at the teacher's suggestion, her mother, lu mei, suspended school for the two girls who frequently asked for leave. in april of that year, she took her three children to the provincial hospital for treatment.

five departments of the provincial hospital conducted consultations on xiaoyu's condition, but could not confirm the diagnosis. six months later, the doctor suggested that lu mei transfer the child to shanghai or beijing for medical treatment. so, on september 21, 2023, the mother and daughter arrived at shanghai children's hospital medical center. because of repeated abdominal pain that lasted for two months, xiaoyu was admitted to the gastroenterology department, general surgery department and nephrology department of shanghai children's medical center.

the torture of disease, the noisy environment, and the cumbersome medical procedures could not stop xiaoyu's enthusiasm for learning. while in bed, she still insisted on reading, taking online classes, and even checked in to learn english on a language learning app, ranking first for many days in a row.

but a month later, all this was changed by a nightmare.

xiaoyu's kidney disease has not yet been diagnosed in the above three departments. considering that xiaoyu had abdominal pain accompanied by numbness in his hands and feet, the doctor made a plan to admit xiaoyu to the neurology department of the hospital for continued examination and treatment.

on october 24, 2023, xiaoyu was admitted to the neurology ward of a children's hospital in shanghai. there are three beds in this ward, and xiaoyu's bed is near the door. on the innermost hospital bed is a child accompanied by his parents, and on the middle hospital bed is a baby accompanied by his grandfather yang moumou.

when she first entered the ward, lu mei felt that yang was very enthusiastic and took the initiative to strike up a conversation with the mother and daughter. at dinner time in the evening, all three daughters were hungry. lu mei settled xiaoyu, who was unable to stand and walk on her own, and with the nurse's consent, she took her two little daughters out to buy food and stopped at a hotel one kilometer away. pick up your luggage.

about an hour later, when lu mei returned to the ward again, it was already dark, but the lights in the ward were not turned on. after she entered the door, she turned on the light and asked, "why did you turn off the light so early?"

yang's grandson and the family of three by the window were still resting. xiaoyu sat on the bed with her arms folded on her chest, crying and telling her mother: "the grandpa next to me touched me."

lu mei immediately ran to the nurse's desk 5 meters away from the ward and told a male doctor and a female nurse at the nurse's desk: "my daughter was touched by someone next to her."

after the doctor and lu mei entered the door, yang asked, "what happened?" lu mei asked him, "what did you do?" yang said, "i didn't do anything."

lu mei carried xiao yu out of the ward and called the police. the report receipt issued by the tangqiao police station of the pudong branch of the shanghai public security bureau shows that at about 19:57 on october 24, 2023, lu mei dialed 110 to call the police.

ten minutes later, the police came and questioned xiaoyu and lu mei in a small room next to the nurse's desk. xiaoyu kept crying and didn't speak. the police asked her for a long time before she revealed the details. subsequently, the police took yang moumou and lu mei's mother and daughter to the police station for transcript and dna examination.

trauma

on the night of the incident, lu mei could not sleep for a long time. xiaoyu woke up suddenly in the middle of the night, crying and asking: "what did i do wrong?" lu mei comforted her daughter and said: "you did nothing wrong."

the next day, xiaoyu didn't speak, didn't cooperate with the treatment, and refused to take medicine. she ignored the doctor's words and just lay on the bed with her face covered, crying silently. on this day, after lu mei's repeated efforts, the hospital finally changed xiaoyu's ward.

on the third day, xiaoyu suddenly said to her mother: "i want to shave my hair." her mother took her to the barber shop. after shaving her head, xiaoyu cried loudly in front of the mirror. from then on, she refused physical contact from anyone, not even her mother. until now, nearly a year has passed. xiaoyu has not taken a bath, lies in bed all day long, does not talk, and relies on sleeping pills to fall asleep every day. her mother could only give her an extra sleeping pill every few days and wipe her body after she fell asleep.

the social work department of the hospital helped xiaoyu contact a psychiatrist and helped get the outpatient number of the shanghai mental health center.

on the ninth day of the incident, november 3, 2023, lu mei took xiaoyu to the shanghai mental health center for treatment for the first time. the first outpatient record stated: "crying, personality changed drastically for a week." xiaoyu was initially diagnosed by the hospital as: acute stress reaction (a transient mental disorder that occurs within minutes or hours after experiencing a severe traumatic event) , mainly manifested as fear, anxiety, anger or sadness, etc.). medical history records show that xiaoyu had an extroverted personality before illness. during his hospitalization, he was molested by the escort in the next bed. after that, he developed severe physical and mental reactions. he was emotionally unstable, cried, refused to be touched by others, shaved his hair, remained silent, had nightmares, and suffered an extreme emotional breakdown. can't sleep.

a week later, xiaoyu was diagnosed with ptsd (post-traumatic stress disorder). different from acute stress reactions that usually only appear within a few days after the trauma, which does not exceed one month at most, the onset time of ptsd is generally more than one month. some ptsd lasts for years, with the condition prolonging over time.

from november 2023 to april 2024, lu mei took xiaoyu to see an outpatient clinic at the shanghai mental health center once a week. from april to now, due to lack of money, this frequency has been reduced to once a month.

before the spring festival of 2024, psychological counselor chen qian began to provide psychological intervention for xiaoyu. the first time she saw xiaoyu, xiaoyu was wrapped tightly from head to toe, even his eyes were not exposed.

chen qian realized that she could not use conventional psychological counseling, sand table and other working methods for xiaoyu, and instead adopted non-talking psychological treatment methods such as taking the mother and daughter to the park to play, taking them to eat local dishes and ice cream.

but in the many contacts between chen qian and xiaoyu, xiaoyu never spoke. only when chen qian took them out to play, did xiaoyu make eye contact with her a few times, and there were a few brief smiles on his face.

the outpatient ticket of the shanghai mental health center recorded xiaoyu's psychological changes: the outpatient ticket on december 8, 2023 mentioned for the first time that xiaoyu had self-injurious behavior. over the next 9 months, symptoms continued to worsen. in june 2024, due to xiaoyu's self-harm behavior, the shanghai mental health center issued an "involuntary hospitalization notice". on the outpatient list on july 23, 2024, in addition to what was mentioned before: "unwilling to go out, unwilling to take a bath, uncooperative in contact, mute, conscious, and sometimes uncooperative in taking medicine. wearing a hat and wrapping it in a scarf she has a sullen face and engages in self-injurious behavior when she is nervous.” he also added, “i have recently had my menstrual period and my mood is unstable.”

lu mei said that after menarche, xiaoyu cried for seven days and associated menstruation with molestation incidents. she said to her mother: "it's because i was subjected to that (violation) that i became like this." lu mei kept explaining and comforting her daughter, "this is a normal physiological phenomenon, and every girl will have it."

kidney disease and psychological trauma were intertwined, causing xiaoyu's condition to not only not improve, but to worsen. in the past month or so, her kidney disease has worsened and her appetite has become worse. she needs to be fed by her mother to eat only a few mouthfuls.

on september 24, when a reporter from "china philanthropist" met xiaoyu's mother and daughter in a serviced apartment in beijing, xiaoyu had just taken antipyretics and was sleeping in bed. most of the time, she covered her head with a quilt, showing no curiosity or reaction to the world outside the window or the conversations between her mother and volunteers in the living room. she barely made any noise except for the occasional cough and roll. except for her mother and sister, she refuses any communication from outsiders, including eye contact.

rescue

"asking for help: after reading this girl's experience, my heart is bleeding. who has the corresponding resources to support? this situation cannot be solved with short-term financial help and requires long-term follow-up." september 19 in the evening, cui lanxin, secretary-general of the beijing chunmiao charity foundation, forwarded xiaoyu's relevant reports in wechat moments and wrote this.

"look for me." liu zhengchen, secretary-general of beijing new sunshine charity foundation, left a message below.

a few minutes later, a wechat group called "bangbang 9-year-old her" was established. in addition to cui lanxin and liu zhengchen, qiu xu, secretary-general of the beijing tongxinyuan charity foundation, sun xuemei, the initiator of "girls protection", and psychological counselor chen qian, etc. have successively joined the group chat. liu zhengchen said that the beijing new sunshine charity foundation can first provide a grant of 50,000 yuan to serve this family.

in the next two days, the communication in this group always lasted until early morning, ranging from the mother and daughter's physical and mental treatment, stable residence, and educational companionship, to the mother and daughter's needs for warmth, daily necessities, and even fine clothing after the weather turned colder. during the rescue process, everyone took it into consideration to minimize the frequency of men appearing in front of xiaoyu.

in the end, several public welfare organizations agreed that the beijing new sunshine charity foundation would take the lead in formulating a social service plan for lu mei, mother and daughter. the top priority is to provide a stable residence for the mother and daughter, provide psychological treatment for xiao yu, provide physical treatment for the mother and daughter, and provide educational companionship for xiao yu's two younger sisters.

after evaluating all aspects of the situation and soliciting opinions from the mother and daughter, new sunshine decided to bring xiaoyu’s family to beijing on the evening of september 21. they booked a hotel-style apartment for xiaoyu's family, and arranged for xiaoyu a female psychological counselor who specializes in ptsd treatment. at the same time, we are also actively thinking of ways to arrange for xiaoyu's two younger sisters to transfer to kindergarten and primary school.

on the evening of september 21, lu mei couldn't believe her ears when she received a call from liu zhengchen on a chair in the outpatient hall of shanghai children's medical center. she later told a reporter from "china philanthropist" that she didn't even dare to smile after receiving the good news. "i was afraid that if i smiled, the good things would be wiped out."

over the past year, the four mother and son have experienced misfortune, but they have also met many good people, including when they were in shanghai. a community charity organization successively funded xiaoyu’s treatment and accommodation expenses of 8,000 yuan, and the person in charge also treated them personally. helped. family members of xiaoyu's patients also provided xiaoyu with wheelchairs and other items, and some even gave her 500 yuan directly.

on september 22, under the relay of love, the mother and daughter took the high-speed train to beijing and moved into a serviced apartment. starting from the next day, an an, a volunteer from beijing tongxinyuan charity foundation, took xiaoyu and lu mei to beijing children's hospital to solve xiaoyu's high fever problem; shuangshuang, a colleague of new sunshine, took lu mei to the third medical center of the people's liberation army general hospital to check her ankle. injury, an mri examination was performed, and the next treatment suggestions were given after expert consultation. guoguo, a teacher at the new sunshine ward school (a teacher who provides door-to-door schooling services for seriously ill children who are hospitalized or unable to leave home), goes to the apartment every day to take care of xiaoyu's two younger sisters, and also makes a daily study plan.

in the following days, the female staff took xiao yu to see a psychotherapist for a preliminary consultation and interview, took lu mei to check her brain arteriovenous malformation problem, and came to provide education and companionship to xiao yu's two younger sisters. all arrangements were made according to the plan is proceeding in an orderly manner.

on september 24, xiaoyu’s two little sisters and their teacher guoguo had become very familiar. the three of them went out to bask in the sun, pick up leaves, and play on the swings, and had a great time.

xiaoyu's condition also showed promising signs. that afternoon, she woke up from her sleep and suddenly whispered to her mother: "i want to eat raisins." this simple request from her daughter made lu mei cry with joy. after all, this is the first time xiaoyu has asked for something in the past year. when she woke up the next morning, she ate a steamed bun and had a better appetite than before.

"a variety of negative factors have gathered together. without external support, the four of them, mother and daughter, are basically unable to cope. however, their support system is very weak and there are not many relatives and friends who can provide support. at this time, all of us can help helping them is like putting them into a 'social service icu'," liu zhengchen said.

problem

although the most urgent problem of xiaoyu's family has been dealt with, there are still a lot of problems before them, such as: lu mei's brain arteriovenous malformation has risks of bleeding and disability, and requires elective hospitalization; her ankle joint the injury also required hospitalization, but xiaoyu is still unable to leave her mother.

xiaoyu is still afraid of strangers and is especially resistant to men. in their last few days in shanghai, the social work department of shanghai children's medical center arranged for lu mei, mother and daughter, to stay in a hotel. since the hotel didn't have an elevator, the boss went downstairs to open the door and kindly helped lift xiaoyu's wheelchair. as a result, when xiaoyu saw that the boss was a man, he immediately started crying and firmly refused to stay in the hotel.

the "ten-year observation on child sexual assault prevention in china (2013-2023)" released by the girls protection fund of beijing zhongyi charity foundation shows that in cases of child sexual abuse, mental damage is one of the most serious consequences of sexual abuse. child abusers generally suffer severe mental damage, and it is even difficult to recover from the shadow of the victim.

therefore, sun xuemei, chairman of zhongyi and initiator of "girls protection", has been calling for spiritual rescue for children who have been violated. at the same time, compensation for mental damage should be provided to the violated children based on the circumstances of the case.

when lu mei first took xiao yu to see a psychiatrist, the doctor asked lu mei to be mentally prepared, "this disease will not heal in a year or two, and it is easy to relapse after recovery." as the psychological symptoms worsened, the doctor began to lu mei said that xiaoyu has experienced regression (referring to when people are frustrated or faced with anxiety, stress, etc., they give up the more mature adaptation skills or methods they have learned, and regress to a certain behavioral method in their early life stages) , it is recommended to be admitted to the children's separate ward of the shanghai mental health center as soon as possible. he suggested that lu mei prepare 80,000 to 100,000 yuan to accompany xiaoyu in the hospital for 4 to 6 weeks.

the doctor also emphasized that the golden treatment time for mental illness is within one to two years. “it’s been a year now, so we must seize the time.”

lu mei understands, but she has no money. in order to provide medical treatment for their children, the family has exhausted all their savings and owes a lot of debt. after xiao yu was molested, the people's procuratorate of pudong new area, shanghai, during the case handling process, learned that xiao yu was a child living on subsistence allowance and that her family had financial difficulties and required sustained and high treatment costs. she met the application standards for "national judicial assistance" and helped lu mei apply. i received 40,000 yuan in national judicial relief funds, but the money was quickly exhausted.

before receiving assistance from a public welfare organization, lu mei, who was in desperate situation, could only live in the outpatient hall of shanghai children's medical center with her three daughters. sometimes she could only buy one meal for the children every day. the youngest daughter had lice on her head. lu mei accidentally fell and damaged her ligaments, but she couldn't care less.

also because of lack of money, lu mei signed a "criminal understanding letter" with yang moumou, who violated xiaoyu.

on october 24, 2023, the day of the incident, yang moumou was captured by the public security organs and truthfully confessed the main criminal facts. the next day, on suspicion of child molestation, yang was released on bail pending trial by the pudong branch of the shanghai public security bureau. the police told lu mei that because yang was a terminal lung adenocarcinoma patient, he could not be admitted to prison.

on november 9, 2023, the pudong branch of the shanghai public security bureau concluded the investigation of the case and transferred yang to the shanghai pudong new area people's procuratorate for review and prosecution on suspicion of child molestation.

at this time, xiaoyu, who was suffering from kidney disease, was already suffering from severe ptsd. lu mei was unable to afford the cost of the child's treatment, so she proposed a compensation of 120,000 yuan to yang.

lu mei told china philanthropist that prosecutors and legal aid lawyers advised her to lower her standards at the time because yang was a terminal lung adenocarcinoma patient and could die at any time. and once yang dies, she may not get a penny in compensation. lu mei then reduced the amount of compensation to 80,000 yuan, and then to 60,000 yuan, and was eventually bargained down to 55,000 yuan by yang.

on january 26, 2024, lu mei signed the "criminal understanding letter" and received 55,000 yuan in compensation. the "criminal understanding letter" stated: i have considered that yang moumou suffers from serious diseases such as lung adenocarcinoma, and that his children's family conditions are also quite difficult, and i have done my best for this compensation. therefore, as xiaoyu's mother, i accept the apology from yang xx and his family, and voluntarily express my understanding for yang xx's illegal behavior.

this "criminal understanding" became one of the reasons why yang was exempted from prosecution.

on july 22, 2024, the people's procuratorate of pudong new area, shanghai issued a "decision not to prosecute". it believed that yang moumou had committed the acts specified in paragraph 3 of article 237 of the "criminal law of the people's republic of china", but the crime was minor. there is no need to impose a penalty according to article 37 of the "criminal law of the people's republic of china" if there are circumstances such as admission of guilt, confession, compensation and understanding. according to the provisions of article 177, paragraph 2, of the criminal procedure law of the people's republic of china, it was decided not to prosecute yang moumou.

for lu mei, she can only leave the helpless past behind and focus on rebuilding her future life, which is still a long and difficult process.

for the public welfare organizations that provide assistance, every aspect of the rescue process is also difficult. just like liu zhengchen said in the wechat group "help 9-year-old her": "it's hard to pass the test." at least, with so many people helping them, lu mei and her daughter no longer have to face it alone. all this.

now, living in a cozy serviced apartment with one bedroom, one living room, one kitchen and one bathroom, lu mei can at least cook a meal for her children.

"it's been more than a year since i came here, and i finally get to eat home-cooked food," lu mei said.

(to protect the privacy of the interviewees, xiaoyu, lu mei, and xiaokui are all pseudonyms in the article)

author: wang wei