Consumption can be downgraded, but raising children cannot be a failure? This generation of the American middle class is too hardworking...

Consumption can be downgraded, but raising children cannot be a failure? This generation of American middle class is too hardworking...

2024-07-31

HighlightsAfter the consumption downgrade, how do American middle-class families adjust their education spending? To this end, American sociologist Aliyah Hamid RaoIn-depth tracking andShe found that most American dual-income families will still try their best to maintain a high level of spending on their children's education even if one of them is unemployed. However, can such all-out efforts to raise children still ensure the stability of the class today?

Text丨Charlotte Edited丨Keguan

In the past two years, "consumption downgrade" has become a trend and situation.

Not only is the issue still hot on the Chinese Internet, but middle-class American families are also facing the same challenges.

When consumption downgrade comes, should we choose to "downgrade education" at the same time, or continue to invest heavily in raising children?

Eliya Hamid Rao, an American sociologist and assistant professor at the London School of Economics and Political Science, investigated the choices made by middle-class American parents from a special perspective.

Author Aliya Hamid Rao and her latest research

Over the course of three years, she conducted in-depth follow-up interviews with more than 70 families, all of which were standard dual-income families with annual incomes ranging from $150,000 to $600,000 before unemployment.Nearly half of the families have children in the K12 stage, about one-third of them have at least one child attending private schools, and the remaining families have children attending top-ranked public schools in the local area.

After research, AliaIt was found that after one of the middle-class families in the United States lost his or her job, many families chose to maintain a high level of spending on their children’s education, gritting their teeth and spending money to continue “raising their children”; some of them even achieved the goal of “raising their children” at home full-time!

It truly illustrates that money can be earned again, but raising a child cannot be left unfinished.

"Pretending to be rich"?

Unemployed but still can't stop raising children

Taking into account the social class and income of the interviewees, the unemployed men and women that Aliya chose to interview were typical middle-class people who had worked in careers such as marketing and project management and had worked as lawyers, IT analysts, engineers, and financial analysts.

Compared with the average national income of American society, their relative income is higher. The sharp drop in income caused by one party's unemployment will also have a significant impact on the overall situation of the family.

Screenshot from the movie "Admission Notice"

Not only that, by counting the education expenses for children, she found that some families are still very persistent in pushing their children to study hard even after their parents lose their jobs. This behavior of forcing their children to study hard will appear no matter which parent is unemployed, but the form of expression is different.

So where exactly is the difference? It is particularly obvious in terms of specific consumer spending.

Father is unemployed

Maintain normal spending and maintain high education spending

"We take our son skiing. To be honest, the expenses are not small, but this is what parents should do." For Scott, who has been unemployed for half a year and is under tremendous financial pressure, it is natural to maintain all the normal expenses for his children.

Through statistics, Alia found that there are many families like Scott.They have one thing in common: their fathers are unemployed.。

In other words, after the father loses his job, no matter how high the expenses are, as long as they are the children's regular consumption in the past, the family will choose to continue to support them., such as staying in a neighborhood with the best public schools or continuing to send their children to expensive private schools.

But doesn’t this practice increase the financial burden on families?

In fact, such families often believe that providing their children with elite education is an irreversible economic obligation. Even if they cannot guarantee their children's upward mobility, they must at least maintain the status quo.These families view any failure to maintain normal expenses as a serious failure on the part of the father and a threat to the family's social status.

Screenshot from the movie "Admission Notice"

Even if the family is in financial difficulty, in order to let their children continue to feel a sense of belonging in a wealthy community, they are even willing to invest in advance and make arrangements for their children's college expenses, such as college savings accounts, stocks, and bonds, to show the family's emphasis on education.

Alia pointed out directly that in families where the father is unemployed, any cuts are seen as changes that are harmful to the children, so the threshold for child spending is kept at a "normal" level, that is, maintaining the previous consumption level, including high-cost home care, highly paid family nutritionists, and expensive items such as iPads and Uggs.

In addition to struggling to hold on, the unemployed father also hopes that his children will not be troubled by the family's financial crisis, so he chooses not to tell his children the truth about his unemployment, or tells them in a euphemistic way.In their view, it is also the responsibility of parents to "not let children worry about money."

Screenshot of the American TV series This Is Us

Scott, an unemployed father who participated in the survey, was responsible for two-thirds of the family's income. After losing his job, his family was in financial distress, but the couple kept it a secret from their children for several months because "this is not something the children should consider."

After the child accidentally learned the truth, Scott emphasized that "unemployment is a normal part of life" and assured the child that unemployment is not something to worry about. He repeatedly explained to the child that he was just considering which company to go to next, and he did not tell the child about the couple's frugality. Instead, Scott told his son that he would continue to support his private school and told him to buy things without worry.

Screenshot from the documentary My Life: Eton College

Kevin's situation is similar. He earns nearly $300,000 a year, which accounts for more than two-thirds of the family's annual income. Although he has been unemployed for a year, he still insists on sending his children to expensive private schools. Even though his son's tuition alone costs $30,000 to $40,000 per school year, he still tells his son, "It actually doesn't affect you at all. It's no big deal."

For another father, Todd,What bothered his son more than his job loss was his realization that his hobby of playing baseball was expensive.

For these fathers, even making their children aware of how much education costs can make them feel like they have failed in their parental responsibilities.

Mother is unemployed

Reduce regular spending and maintain education spending

Unlike his unemployed father,After the mother loses her job, the family will cut other expenses on the children except education, including expansion expenses and entertainment expenses.For example, the children's interest classes, summer camps that cost $8,000 every year, and outings that cost $1,000 each time. But this is not a unilateral decision made by the parents, but usually the result of a joint discussion with the children, and the whole family advances and retreats together.

Unlike unemployed fathers, unemployed mothers discuss unemployment with their children more directly.

Screenshot from the movie Sorry We Missed You

When Darlene, the family's breadwinner, lost her job, she discussed the situation with her teenage son right away so he wouldn't worry.

Darlene's family used to go to a restaurant near their home every Sunday for dinner, but this family ritual was canceled after Darlene lost her job. This was a decision made by the whole family. They offset the loss of ritual by saying that "Mom just needs to cook more at home."

Screenshot of the American TV series This Is Us

In addition, during Alia's survey, a middle-class unemployed mother interviewed said that she had recently started shopping at second-hand grocery stores.

"Although about half of the Christmas gifts this time were bought at second-hand grocery stores, the quality of these toys is just as good!" She also told her children that participating in the circulation of second-hand items will help them understand society and their own growth.

Claire's income accounts for one-third of the family's income. After losing her job, the family relies on her husband Elliot's annual income of about $300,000. Elliot and his wife have been emphasizing the positive side of unemployment to their 10-year-old son.

"At first the child was very worried because the nanny was fired.，"But after a while, the kids figured out that there were benefits to mom being unemployed:Mom can stay at home with him more often.The opportunity to do things she couldn't do at work,For example, go to school together to participate in activities, and sign up for study tours together.”

For children, a decrease in family income will lead to a decline in their life experience, but the loss is compensated by the fact that their mother has more time to accompany them.

Why do we still need to force children to grow up after consumption downgrades?

Even when they are unemployed, they still insist on raising their children. The choice of American middle-class parents may be puzzling, but Alia found that there are many hidden anxieties behind this choice.

The Big Picture of Risk Privatization

However, many economic studies have found that there is such a phenomenon in the United States: represented by the American elite, they work together to transfer the risks that should be borne by the government or the super-rich, replace public mechanisms with the market, and reduce public products.Shifting the burden of many of life’s risks disproportionately onto those without significant private wealth.

In 2005, Hurricane Katrina was a major event. The hurricane caused catastrophic damage and displaced 1 million people. In order to recover the financial losses, the Florida government decided to cut public investment in social services, physical infrastructure, public communications and public administration. This situation was then followed by other state governments and implemented nationwide.

From small items like water and electricity bills to public facilities like stadiums, cuts in fiscal investment have forced individual households to spend more money on these items.

The United States once implemented a home Internet subsidy program called the "Affordable Connectivity Program". When the news that the program would be terminated in May this year was released, many families were worried that they might lose their jobs or opportunities for health care services (because telemedicine is more cost-effective), not to mention that their children's learning would be affected.

According to US media CNET, about 23 million people in the United States are affected by the project closure.

When the risks in life are more transferred to ordinary people to bear,The lower the level of a family, the greater the challenges they face, and their fear of "falling down the social ladder" naturally intensifies.Instead, it further stimulates parents to focus on protecting their own wallets, ensuring their own quality of life, and reducing investment in public facilities and undertakings, forming a vicious cycle.

Fight the fear of a "fall" with high education spending

In order to ensure their children's future socioeconomic status, education is considered by many middle-class parents to be an extremely important way.American sociologist Coleman once published the famous "Coleman Report" in the history of sociology, pointing out the important influence of school environment and family background on children's growth.

There is also a status acquisition model proposed by two famous American sociologists, Blau and Duncan, which also confirms that "reading is useful" in modern society.

Blau and Duncan's status attainment model

Especially under the influence of neoliberalism,Everyone sees success more as the result of individual efforts. In addition, most middle-class parents are also beneficiaries of education.After seeing the cruel side of American society, they believe that education has positive feedback and that investment will bring returns.。

Parents who have benefited from education follow their instinct to benefit and are more determined to use their resources to get their children into good schools, hoping that better educational resources can help their children move to a higher level.

Screenshot from the movie "Admission Notice"

These have not only given rise to a series of phenomena such as intensive parenting and helicopter parents, but parents often intervene strongly in their children's lives, on the one hand making many rules and prohibitions, and on the other hand investing a lot of time to support their children's learning activities. Now, not only do they have to study well, but they also have to do well in art, sports, socializing, and activities.

It also makes them continue to push their children forward even after they lose their jobs, treating encouraging their children as a shot of adrenaline for themselves.

The traditional idea of "men work outside and women work inside" is pushing the carriage forward

During the interview, Alia also found that the solidified social stereotypes about the division of labor in the family also have a great impact on parents' attitudes towards parenting.

Under traditional concepts, the father's income is regarded as the economic pillar of the family, while the mother's income is "pocket money"; Especially during layoffs, employers are more inclined to retain white men. This concept not only affects the concept of family, but also actually affects which parent loses the job.

In families where the mother is unemployed, parents tend to downplay the importance of the mother's work to the family and emphasize the idea of an exchange.Not only children but also other family members are considered the main beneficiaries of mothers' unemployment, as mothers exchange their own occupational resources for family resources.

Alia met one mother who, after losing her job, spent her time doing unpaid care work for her elderly parents and in-laws instead of looking for new work.

Stills from the movie "The Father"

However, the economic crisis has also made dual-income couples pay more attention to work.As mass layoffs continue, grandparents have become an extra helping hand for young families, temporarily filling the gap between child-related expenses and family income.

In Alia's investigation, when Frank lost his job, his father began paying for childcare for his youngest daughter. "My father helped because we had to put our daughter in daycare, she was only 4 years old, and it cost $900 a month," Frank said.

Brian's father paid for his children's four years of college tuition while he was unemployed. "My teenage sons did not miss the opportunity to go to college," he said. "My father paid for almost everything, including car fare, gas, food and books."

Ineffective internal competition has no future for children

In the current era of consumption downgrade, layoffs are indeed a big deal, not to mention that education expenses are increasing, and children are more affected. However, this also means that we should look at what kind of parenting is more conducive to the growth of children in this situation.

Allison Pugh, a professor of sociology at the University of Virginia, mentioned in Longing and Belonging: Parents, Children, and Consumer Culture,It is important to let children feel that consumption behavior is "dignified"Sometimes parents convey the values of good parenting by “not doing things,” such as not buying games, and sometimes they practice “symbolic indulgence” by buying expensive consumer goods, throwing birthday parties, or spending big on trips to Disneyland.

The key point is that children should be able to understand and form correct values, rather than viewing education merely as a tool to transfer class.

Screenshot from the documentary My Life: Eton College

Back to the issue of pushing children to school, more and more studies have shown that ineffective internal push is of little use.

In a Nobel Prize-winning study in economics, economist Angrist and colleagues compared a super-elite school with a regular high school.

Elite SchoolsBoston Latin High SchoolIt is one of the top 20 high schools in the United States, and the entrance examination score requirements are extremely strict; ordinary high schoolBoston Latin AcademyThe ranking is not as good as the former, and the score line for students who chose to participate in the research was only a few points lower.

The most interesting part of the research is that when these two groups of students began to prepare for college, the researchers examined their PSAT, SAT, and AP test scores...The results showed that there was no significant difference in the students' performance.

Stills from the American TV series "Young Sheldon"

The same situation also occurs in universities.There is not much difference in the earning ability after graduation between Ivy League students and those who almost didn't get into Ivy League schools.

Indeed, education is not a business that can make a lot of money. Continuously investing in children and rolling in the towel does not necessarily mean that children can be sent to elite schools, get good jobs, and achieve class leaps. Education emphasizes long-term returns, and is more about the returns of children's growth.

In a word, don’t get stuck in a vicious circle when raising children. Consumption has been downgraded, and it’s not easy for everyone. You can try to start from the end in mind and consider your child’s education from the perspective of what kind of person you want your child to become.Being a parent is a job with unlimited responsibilities, and one should not judge a child’s growth by whether the child ends well or not.

It's good when we try our best to give our children all we can and wait for the flowers to bloom.

references:

Rao, A. H. (2022). Relational Work in the Family: The Gendered Microfoundation of Parents’ Economic Decisions. American Sociological Review, 87(6), 1094-1120.

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Consumption can be downgraded, but raising children cannot be a failure? This generation of American middle class is too hardworking...

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